Developing Emotional Intelligence (EQ) at a personal level begins by understanding your current emotions and their meanings, then learning how to manipulate your reactive emotions and become in control of your emotional outcomes at home and in the workplace.
With this understanding, you must uncover productive ways to measure, monitor and manage your emotions, then use them to the benefit yourself and others in the workplace.
When you attend a one-day course on Emotional Intelligence in the Workplace delivered by Pdtraining in Sydney, Brisbane and Melbourne, you’ll be introduced to several methods to help you control and self-manage your emotions.
How to Accurately Perceive Emotions
The words that people say are only half of the message they are trying to communicate.
The tone in which they say it, or the emotion tied to their words, is the other half. For example, if co-worker says, “you don’t understand what I’m trying to do here” with the look of concern or in a caring tone of voice, he /she is actually saying, “we need to communicate better”.
On the other hand, if a co-worker says the same sentence with sneer, he / she could be saying, “I never really liked you.”
The ability to decide what is actually being said lies in your ability to decode the message by looking beyond the words themselves. It is important that you do not allow your emotional state of being to cloud your judgment of what is being said. Focus on the message (verbally and non-verbally) itself in order to accurately perceive the emotions of others.
Understand that as you improve your ability to use your emotional intelligence, others may not have the same skills or awareness.
Use Emotions to Facilitate Thinking
‘Use emotions to facilitate thinking’ is such a profound statement. How one feels will determine how he/she views situations. If you are in a happy mood, everyday events don’t seem so bad. But if you are not in a happy mood, even the smallest setback can seem like a major drama.
When it comes to functioning in the workplace, regardless of your mood, your boss expects you to be a high performer. So make it easy on yourself by ‘choosing’ to be in a good mood as much as possible.
Understanding Emotional Meanings
The underlying reason as to why you feel the way you do is very important to understand.
If you know why you are unhappy, you can either alter the thing that is making you unhappy or consciously tell yourself that ‘thing’ is not worth allowing you to be upset, which can ultimately turn your negative mood into a positive one. Having this understanding can not only be used to internally gauge yourself, but can also help with how you interact with co-workers.
Knowing what emotion you are exhibiting, or understanding the reason for that emotion, is not enough to manage your emotions. Managing your emotions is a conscious and active task.
This can be done in several ways:
1. Step Outside Yourself and Consider Your Reactions
2. If you find yourself angry or otherwise over-reacting, stop what you are doing and take 10 deep breaths
3. If you find others over-reacting, do not react to their over-reaction – Instead simply ask them why they are reacting the way they are
4. Simply stopping and asking this question can often diffuse an uncomfortable situation
The overall goal is to establish strategies that utilize your emotions to help accomplish a goal rather than allowing your emotions to use you to create a futile outcome.
It is important to remember that your emotions are not the ‘enemy’. They contain valuable information that if used properly, can help you make sound decisions.